Balancing Act

Originally published as a note on Facebook on January 27, 2015

I have loved this bible verse since I first read it:


Colossians 3:12-14New Living Translation (NLT)
12 Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. 13 Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. 14 Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony.


It serves as a human interaction guide for me. I seem to frequently miss the mark on humility and patience, but I am filled with compassion (aka tenderhearted mercy), kindness and gentleness … Unfortunately, this often causes me to become emotionally hurt easily. I have been feeling incredibly blessed recently, so have been trying to find random things to do that might help to make other people’s lives a little easier. Occasionally those random acts of kindness have been misinterpreted, and while that doesn’t happen often, it really hurts when my motives are questioned.


Here is where the balancing act comes in …


Proverbs 4:23New Living Translation (NLT)
23 Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.


There are been many times throughout my lifetime that I have opened the door wide to being hurt because I didn’t remember to set healthy boundaries … if I had remembered this, perhaps those random acts of kindness would not have been misinterpreted. I tend to approach life from a “how would I feel if someone did this for (or to) me??” perspective … maybe I need to switch it up and approach life from a “how will this be interpreted” perspective. BUT, that could lead to a plethora of missed opportunities to do good in someone else’s life because I’m afraid of how it will be interpreted … It’s probably the leading reason that I don’t tell myself or others NO as often as I should, whether it’s feeding the neighborhood kids unexpectedly or pulling together a report that is clearly outside of my job requirements.


I’m clearly a work in progress and I have no control over how others feel about me or interpret my actions and motives … I do, however, have control over how I react … this is where the “Guard your heart” really comes into play. I spend too much time dwelling on hurt feelings when I really need to forgive myself and others, then move past it. I’m not about to stop doing nice things, like paying for someone else’s groceries or picking up the tab for the guy behind me in drive through … but I do need to guard my heart by asking God “how could this potentially cause me emotional pain further down the road”.